#2: A brief excerpt from ‘Holocaust to Resistance’
How did I become aware, as a young child, of hatred of Jews, the evil that had swept away so many Jews including my mother? The following passage from my book “Holocaust to Resistance, My Journey” describes my awakening.
When I arrived, I spent some time in the infirmary and was then assigned to a bedroom with half a dozen of my female peers. The monitors told stories of the war, adding context and meaning to our communal lives. They spoke of the Jewish heroes whose photos hung on the walls. “They died fighting for our freedom against the Nazi occupation.” Many Jewish people had mysteriously disappeared. Some of the children would whisper in hope after the lights went out for the night: “I’m waiting for my mother…” “I know they’ll be here soon…” “Dad is looking for me, I’m sure…”
I hoped my friends were right. But the lost relatives did not come. At nap time, I sometimes wondered about these lost people. Were they kidnapped? Is that what happened to my mother? But I wasn’t waiting for her. I was certain she wasn’t coming back and was mourning for her.
I began to learn about Jewishness. In addition to our French children’s ditties, we sang Yiddish and Russian songs. We talked about war, peace, and love of humanity. The monitors spoke of people who were brutally chased out of their homes and cities during the war because they were Jewish. My imagination held vivid images of these people, hungry and in rags, in some cases defending themselves with guns. This touched me deeply; I carried these images with me….
Many people helped save the Jewish children, I learned. Among the heroes, I found out, were the Bermans, who had been part of the Jewish partisan movement. They helped save me! I realized. Why are they so distant and cold? Much later, I forgave them their reserve, which must have been a shield against the pain they’d suffered. I stared out the window beside my bed and conjured up images in the clouds. What can be done so that justice and world peace prevail?
Now we had peace at last, we were told. And yet my personal experiences told me that the persecution of Jews was alive. When I was living in Le Raincy, I was walking one day with the other children to the local public school, and passersby on the other side of the road shouted at us, calling us “dirty Jews.” It was as though they’d thrown a rock at us. It was shocking and threatening, but I don’t recall any discussion of the incident. I wondered if I’d misunderstood what had happened. But it happened again….
Holocaust to Resistance: My Journey, pp. 17-18
Copyright © 2019 Suzanne Berliner Weiss
What an invaluable blog you have set up. And there is so much information. Am still learning about navigating blogs. This is the most accessible I’ve experienced. Thank you.
It’s a new experience for me too, dear Karen. It’s important to keep up with the young who are finding new ways to seek information and to organize.